Get Lost: Embracing the Adventure of Connection: A Reflection from Moana 2

Have you ever felt stuck—trapped in patterns of fear, holding back from the life you truly want to live? The lyrics of Get Lost, from the soundtrack of the newest Moana film, echo the longing for freedom and the courage it takes to embrace vulnerability.

As a marriage and family therapy student and practicing Intern working through an Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) lens, I see this journey of “getting lost” as a metaphor for stepping out of your comfort zone to foster deeper emotional connections and personal growth.

In relationships, it’s easy to get caught in rigid roles, defensive patterns, and fears of failure. Much like the lyrics describe, we might feel like we’re “wading through the fears” or stuck in a “giant clam” of safety and stagnation. But what if the very thing holding you back is the belief that playing it safe is the only way to protect yourself?

The Dance of Fear and Longing

EFT views love and connection as a dance between two partners—each moving to the rhythm of their emotions. Fear often keeps us from moving freely. We stay guarded, afraid to trust, afraid to take risks. But when we do this, we deny ourselves the “thrill of living dangerously”—not reckless living, but the kind of vulnerability that allows us to say, “I trust you with my heart, even when I’m afraid.”

This song reminds us that there is no map to love or growth. There’s no guaranteed destination where everything feels perfect. Relationships are not about certainty; they are about showing up fully, even in the discomfort.

The Power of Vulnerability

The lyrics urge us to “take a look around… on the edge, it’s all about living bold and free.” EFT teaches us that true freedom in relationships comes from risking vulnerability. Instead of avoiding the edge, we learn to lean into it. This might mean expressing our deepest fears to a partner or acknowledging how our protective patterns, like withdrawing or criticizing, keep us from the connection we desire.

When couples or individuals work to “expand their mind” and trust one another, they create new possibilities for connection. It’s about stepping out of the roles you’ve been stuck in and daring to be authentic.

Breaking the Rules

“The rules are ours to break,” the song says. Often, our relationships operate under unspoken rules:

• Don’t rock the boat.

• Don’t express too much emotion.

• Always be the strong one.

But healing requires breaking these rules. EFT invites us to rewrite the story of our relationship, to create space for emotions that have been silenced and needs that have gone unmet.

Trusting the Fall

As the spoken word section of the song reflects, “Life’s unfair, it’s full of choices… but trust the fall, and you can have it all.”

This mirrors one of the core principles of EFT: trust the process. When you and your partner step into the unknown, allowing yourselves to “get lost” emotionally, you make room for discovery. You find new ways to connect, to repair wounds, and to build a foundation of safety and security.

What It Means to Get Lost

Getting lost is about leaving behind the familiar and daring to explore uncharted emotional territory. Whether you’re seeking deeper intimacy with a partner, healing from relational wounds, or rediscovering yourself, the invitation remains the same:

• Cut loose: Let go of rigid patterns and expectations.

• Lose your way: Be willing to sit in the discomfort of not having all the answers.

• Live dangerously: Risk vulnerability, knowing it’s the gateway to true connection.

When you take these steps, you might feel like you’re falling, but in the words of the song, “Trust the fall, and you can have it all.”

A Call to Action

What would it look like for you to get lost in your relationships or your personal journey? Where are you holding back, playing it safe, or staying stuck? I encourage you to take one small step toward vulnerability this week. Maybe it’s sharing a fear with your partner or asking for support when you feel overwhelmed.

Remember, the thrill of connection and growth is found on the edge, where you dare to let go of control and trust the process. So, take the leap. Get lost. And find the freedom you’ve been longing for.